Lately, I have been studying some widely varied topics on brain chemistry, brain waves, exercises and how our minds affect those things. This morning, in between listening to some different frequencies that are musical tunes designed to elicit specific changes in the brain: I stopped to listen to a podcast on the topic, and the subject matter dealt with the idea of celebrating victories. For some, this can be seen as controversial, because some people are so opposed to any appearance of
egotism, that they downplay their own successes, and those of others. Some operate out of a fear of arrogance to such a degree, any acknowledgement of victory by themselves or others grates on them. This ought not to be.
The Antidote For Arrogance The antidote for arrogance is gratitude. Sure, over the top bragging about what one has accomplished can be offputting, and sometimes downright demeaning, but you can avoid that with one ingredient. Thankfulness is a trait that exudes humility, when you or I stop to show that someone else helped us get where we are, shedding light on those who provided inspiration, training, discipline and any other meaningful aspect to the success, then there is a community synergy that comes into play.
Take A Moment, Make A Moment Taking a moment to be thankful for small and big things on a daily basis also changes our brain chemistry. One of the best strategies for overcoming depression is to stop and write down 10 things that you are thankful for. When I am on top of my routines, I write down at least three things that I am thankful for, and it can be as simple as the chair I am sitting in, to my wife for her role in my life, to the clean drinking water. Taking a moment to pause and consider that many in the world do not have these comforts is sobering.
Stories When I tell stories, they are generally about my struggles, or the successes of others. That does not stop some people from criticizing me for ‘always talking about himself’, to which I counter, “The stories I tell are about times I found something very difficult, or times my players succeeded and I had the privilege of facilitation.”. To those who react that way, nothing can sooth them. My hope for them, is that they can learn to celebrate along with people. Your success is my success, because you can inspire me to do more.
Criticisms In 2011, I told someone, who I thought was a friend, that I want to be a thought leader in sports. He said it was the most arrogant thing he had ever heard. I replied that if I have a thought, and then I share it, and after that someone hears it, likes it, is inspired by it or finds it useful in some way, then voila, i’m a thought leader. No dice, he could not follow that logic. Since that time he has proven to be very toxic in many ways. It’s so sad. Oddly enough, he is person who in his social media does not show his face. As a matter of branding, it’s our person, our face, the way we talk and interact, that’s our brand. He hides behind a logo. There is no gratitude there, no personal connection, no inspiration. It’s hard to write about, but you have to take the good with the bad. Sometimes the shadow is caused by the sun, and it helps you to see the difference between light and dark.
Dark Times Be thankful even in dark times, and we as a society are going through some hardships. The economic difficulty is just beginning, but you and I can be thankful that it challenges us to come up with strategies for success. I know with gas over $4 a gallon at the cheapest station near me, I think hard about how i’m going to make multiple stops to get everything done in one trip, because each time out in the car is going to cost $5.
We should be thankful for our clientele, and openly express appreciation for their support, and also pledge ours. There have been times that I know a family is having a hard time, so I give them a drastic discount on their lessons. Rarely, I have taught some players for free, but that usually does not go well, because then their is no buy in to what we are doing, and they often skip out, because it’s free. Gratitude is free, but work is not.
Making Rich In Experiences One of the pivotal moments in my life came when I was teaching the daughter of an extremely wealthy man, who came one time to pick her up in his Rolls Royce. This man was worth hundreds of millions of dollars. When he signed a very large check to me, looked me in the eye, and gave the most sincere thank you I have ever heard, as he handed me the check. He did that because he valued me, and what I was building into his daughter as a tennis player and person. The value of what I was doing far exceeded the amount of money that he had to pay. I later found out, that this family is extremly frugal, and that they go to discount shops, and that they way his family accumulated great wealth was by saving money. The Rolls? That appreciates in value, so after driving it, he could then sell it for more money, so no loss in that regard. They saved on many many things so that they could afford the big things, but they don’t save on education or gratitude. No stinginess to be found. Well, this was a bit of a ramble, but no matter what your station in life, there is someone or something for which to be thankful. I am most grateful for the many brilliant mentors and teachers I have had, and have not yet, and that you are here on this journey with me exploring the knowledge that matters.
Bill Patton has been in the Sports Coaching Industry for over 30 years, and has mastered his craft. He currently works with CEOs of Start Ups, High Ranking Military Leaders, The Winning Summit, Tennis Innovation Week, and BrainSports.Coach a new site that delivers cutting edge brain research. Bill’s mission is to give you the competitive edge by delivering fundamental, non-conventional, counter-intuitive, nuanced skills to take your game, coaching, learning and parenting to a new level. The main objectives of this blog is to give the very latest, most ignored, and opposing views of conventional wisdom, so that you won’t have to make the mistakes Bill formerly made in using his own supercomputer. Much has been about becoming 1% better, and Coach Patton is dedicated to his own constant improvement and yours. Get a FREE 20 minute Sports Brain Consultation. Bill is the author of 12 books, formerly a certified tennis teaching professional for over 25 years, before now settling on the title Sports Neuroscientist. He has a B.S. Industrial Psychology, and written a Masters Thesis in Education. http://www.brainsports.coach/subscribe